The other night, I was with a group of friends and shared this revelation - this epiphany I had - with them. It’s simply this: Everything women need to know about how to live with men (and how to deal with men) can be learned from “horsemanship.” I was stunned the other day (as I was re-reading parts of the book “Seabiscuit” when cleaning up the pile of books by my bed) when I realized the similarities between dealing with horses and dealing with men. Who knew?
First of all, there are different kinds of horses, just like different kinds of men. There are horses you need to push… and those you need to hold back. And some people say horses aren’t very smart, but they are. Most of them are. But getting back to horsemanship….slow, deliberate movements are good. No quick, sudden ones. Men don’t like surprises. Also, simple, firm, repetitive commands work best (…”Take the garbage outside“… or “.. toilet seat down“). And an occasional “good boy!” and pat on the neck goes far. Also, horses will eat themselves to death if allowed unlimited food rations. So monitor their intake, always.And if your horse (man) ever has enough of you and bucks you off, just remember this. The best thing you can do - the thing you have to do - is get right back on, keep riding him. He’ll learn.And never try to change them. If yours wants to roll in the dirt right after a bath, let him. Horses will be horses. Men will be men. And let ‘em run wild every once in a while. Don’t hold them back, ever. Eventually, they will come walking back to the barn, exhausted, tired, hungry, and looking for direction from you. Did I mention, my husband says he wants to come back as my horse?